Have you seen the ad with the two vampires selling a breakfast food, where they say, “Mornings, who knew?”Well, this ad and the slogan got me started thinking on what a mom doesn’t want to know. How this happened  I don’t know. It just happened that way, and I went with it, because I’m creative.

This led to thinking of all the things a mom really and truly does not want to know about. You know what I mean; the things your child does when he or she is older. Here are ten things we Moms really and truly do not want to know about our kids:

1. When the first time your child had sex. Nope, I do not want to know this. Maybe I’m just too old school and don’t believe in sharing is caring, but I really do not want to know the particulars. Tell me when you are thirty how old you were when you had sex for the first time…or maybe never.

2. Moms really do not want to know how drunk you got with your friends on the weekend. We moms also do not want to know that you got in a car drunk and drove home drunk. Unless you got hurt, killed someone we really do not want to know, because we will start yelling!

3. Moms really do not want to know when our kids are failing school. We don’t want a report card shoved under our faces when we are falling asleep on the couch, looking very comfortable and almost asleep when that bad report card surfaces. Show us when we are alert enough to yell at you. Sure, I get it, that’s the reason kids play it that way. But if you hide that report card, we’ll find out sooner or later.

4. Moms do not want to know when our kids get in trouble at school.All moms want to have that perfect child who gets great grades, and gets along well with ALL the other kids. But sometimes, our kids no matter how hard we try to do get in trouble. Sometimes it’s a fight they started, and other times it’s a fight where your child defended himself, and the kids at school taunted him.

5. Moms do not want to know when our kids get in trouble with the law. But most moms will say, “I’ll be right there.”

6. No Mom ever wants to hear the words, “There’s been an accident.” We never ever want to find out that one of our kids got into an accident, caused anyone any harm, is in the hospital, and I will not even say the last four letter word, because I do not wish to even write it out.

7. Moms do not want to know their kids are bullying other kids at school.

8. Moms do not want to know that our kids have completely lost it, becoming that kid that loses it and shoots so many kids at school.

9. Most Moms do not want to know that their daughter got pregnant at a really young age. We also do not want to know that our son got his girlfriend, or a female friend pregnant. As Moms we really do not want our children’s future’s ruined, but most of us moms will be there in a heartbeat to help our children out.

10. Moms do not want to know that their child is flunking college. We really do not want to know this. But considering I’ve already been down this road, I did what I thought best and took my son, home and told him we would work through this together. Considering I don’t understand anything above 10th grade Geometry, I could see why taking three math courses in one semester did my son in.

Moms do not want to know that our kids are sexting each other or posting naked pics of themselves or other kids online. We also do not want to know our kids are texting while driving, so don’t text while driving. And do not do what ALL the other kids do, just because All the other kids are doing something stupid. If you think it is stupid, don’t do it. Copyright 2013, written by Kate Johns a talented writer, who has been writing professionally since 2004!